Losing Sleep.. In A Waking Dream

I feel her looking at me. Half smiling at me. I am in Agra at my Nani’s (maternal grandmother) house. I am facing the room on the floor directly above her room.

I can feel her presence. 

I ask Mamaji (Maternal Uncle) who is sitting on the floor outside the room …  “So why can't I marry her?”.  Receiving no response I ask again. Now I feel another presence. It's a man who seems to be her father but can't see him either. 

I look around and see Rupal my cousin. Many more people are present on the floor, familiar for some  odd reason. But can't seem to recall having met them in real life. I repeat myself, but still no response

I wake up... I feel a bit restless and in an unknown time drift back to sleep. 

Back in the same place again, this time I can see her face smiling at me. She seems to be almost as tall me.  Hair slightly open can't clearly make out.  Same set of people around me

I ask again a little bit of desperation, “Will someone tell me why can't I marry her?” Rupal is now looking at me with a very neutral expression.  But I feel she knows the girl. 

I wake up... I feel a bit restless and in an unknown time drift back to sleep. 

Back in the same place. I can now see her more clearly. I know that she is wearing a Saree. But can see only her shoulder she is wearing a dark greenish blue color blouse

I repeat myself “Why is someone not telling me to why cant I marry her?”. Everyone is looking at me again with a neutral expression. No emotion good bad or ugly

I wake up.. I feel a bit more restless and in an unknown time drift back to sleep.

Back in the same place .. I find myself asking yet again “Why cant  I marry her... this time  the man whose presence I felt as her father comes in vision.

He is an average height man who has gray/white hair. He seems familiar but have never seen him in real life. Height wise about slightly shorter then me. Thin mustache. Slightly stout. Average build, no glasses. 

Gets up and tells me  "Beta tum isse shaadi nahi kar sakte" (Son you can’t marry her) I respond "Lekin shaadi karoonga to main aapki beti se.."(But I will marry her)

I wake up.. I feel a bit more restless and in an unknown time drift back to sleep.

  Back again this time I know but a different room with three racks one on each side on the breadth of the  room. One in the center I am leaning my back against the one in center. With my arms around her. I can see her as clear as a sunny day.

She is wearing a dark greenish blue or blueish green as you like it short sleeve blouse. With a dark green color sari, she is wearing a thin gold necklace and is smiling in a way that it just takes your breath away... She has an oval face dark brown color eyes. Clear complexion. Hair untied, wavy straight hair. Length 3 inches below shoulder length. Small Cute nose. Not thin but not fat at all.

I find myself wanting to kiss her.

When she giggles and says... "Toh janab mere se hi shaadi karenge" (So, Sir will marry me alone and no one else) I respond lovingly "Haanji... karni to aap se hi hai shaadi" (Yes Mam.. its only you who I wish to marry)

I wake up. This time I am too restless to sleep at all. I get off the bed pace in the room for about what seems like an hour before getting back to bed.

Now just before I get up I see all this again with quick intervals basically each scene with some gap. Then I am wide awake. The memory of complete sequence clear in mind as a movie just seen.